The Enlightenment

It is odd to think now, how people fresh out of high school jump right onto a career path to full-time ministry. You might be asking what am I talking about. Well I'll tell you, for I had my own encounter with this subject. The trek from Christian to "full-time Christian."

I ended up enrolled at a bible college in Springfield, Missouri. The place was full of genuine, God-loving people hoping to widen their theological knowledge and find a "position" in full-time ministry.

Even though in agreeable company I have to admit it was a very challenging four months there. Yes, four months. Just as my boss in Thailand had predicted.
You say, "what happened to four years?" and I'd tell you, "the realization that there is no Americanized Spirit-fed Master Plan for all those who seek to have a relationship with the biblical God."

As soon as I began my studies there I knew I was going to learn something. Not because it was a bastion of higher learning but because I quickly realized that I was in it together with people who were just as "messed up" as I was. Does this mean that there were other directionless, spiritual wanderers like myself enrolled in "Bible College?" Absolutley.

The only difference is that most of them didn't know they were directionless, spiritual wanderers. How so?

Well, I think it comes down to our culture and our values as a society. In America and much of the rest of the Western world we tend to take whatever it is that we love or desire and try to organize, regimentalize, administrate and hopefully profit from whatever it is we enjoy the most. i.e., hobbies, talents, relationships(including the one we have w/ God.)

During those four months I studied the Life of Paul and took another class called Old Testament Survey. I also had some other classes but they were too insignificant to really remember. I learned much in those classes about the historical accuracy of the bible and the intriguing lives of various people mentioned in its texts.

Yet it was outside the classroom that I gained most of my knowledge about theology/chrisitanity/personal development.

Through sparse but genuine devotions and endless discussions of legalities, apologetics and personal struggle I soon began to realize just how incredibly "human" we all are and how the redemptive qualities of faith in Christ and behavior that emulated Him applied to all of us. As we were all(every last one of us) in desperate need of that redemption.

"So where were the directionless wanderers?" you ask. Ah, they were the ones bouncing back and forth between the legal barriers they had constructed for themselves, praying they would be "funneled" through righteousness. The ones who pondered incessantly about which law they "or others" had trespassed that day. The same ones who had showed up in places like bible colleges because they were blind to the fact that the peak of a cultivated spiritual relationship with God is when we have the ability to simply "enjoy" the fruits of "His being" in our lives rather than "our being" in His pulpits, sunday schools, etc,etc. In essence, people like me.

Those whose spirituality relied on the adherence of self preservation rather than brokeness and openess with the One whom we so desperately sought approval from.

By the end of those four months I came to the conclusion that bible college was not the place for me. That, although marked with a huge "X" on the map to "Better American Christian Living and Spiritual Satisfaction", this was not the place where I would be happiest in serving God.
I was so convinced that this was true that I left school 2 weeks before school let out(this was I have to admit due to my immaturity and also my .40 GPA).

I arrived home and a day later received a phone call from my former boss in Thailand.
"How's life over there?" I said. "Not so good, I miss Thailand." He said, "Well we miss you here, how about I front you the money for a plane ticket and you can pay me back when you get here." I said, "Excellent." He said, "When do you want it for?" I said, "My sister gets married in a couple of days and I want it for the day after her wedding." He said, "Done."

My dad came home that night and said "If you aren't studying then you need to get a job." And I said," I've already got one back in Thailand and I'll be leaving at the end of the week."
I could tell he was disappointed but I sometimes wonder if this proved to him that Thailand really was my "home." At least for this time in my life.
My sister's wedding was wonderful and the next day both my sisters and my brother drove me to the airport to bid me farewell once more.

Although saddened not to have lived up to my parents expectations I was ecstatic to return to the Land of Smiles. For it was during this time in my life that things would start becoming "interesting" to say the least.